I Don’t Fit Inside a BDSM Cookie Cutter because I’m not a Damn Cookie

I’m not a girly-girl, and I’m even less of a lady. The only reason you’re seeing me with my knees together is that I’m not wearing any underwear. I’m too feminine to be gender queer and, to top it off, I’m a really crap sub. I’ll make you coffee. I’ll even make sure I have your favourite blend, but by the time I hand it to you, most of it will be spilled down the front of my dress. How sexy do I look now?

I’m girly enough to own stilettos, but not girly enough to be able to walk in them. I own those sexy-ass thigh-high stockings, too, but when I tried them on, I covered them in snags. If you want to see Red in her sexy gear, you’re going to have to lower your standards a tiny bit.

(Continued below) 

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I’ll do anything you want me to. Really, I will. I swear… if I can remember it. I’ll follow every one of your instructions about how I should be ready for play, except for the 75% I forgot, so expect to hear me calling for reminders from upstairs.

Does the fact that I recently spent a weekend getting served meals and backrubs by a dom make me a switch? I thought not, but sometimes I dole out instructions anyway. All doms automatically turn into subs when the sub in question gets sick and whiney. It’s true.

I’m not subly enough to spend 24 hours a day in heels. Sometimes I’ll even wear a terrycloth robe with my gramma’s name embroidered on it. </not even kidding> Oh, and are these two pairs of socks I’m wearing suave enough for you? I knew they were, baby. Now tell me how cute I look or I’ll drink your hot chocolate.

You’d think I’d at least be a half-decent brat, but nope. I promised to start earning spankings over a month ago, and thus far I’ve only managed two attempts that were so lame I don’t even remember what I did. However, being as subly as I am, I will still insist I did a fine enough job of bratting so that belt had better be forthcoming.

I don’t fit inside a BDSM cookie cutter because I’m not a damn cookie. I do kink according to a reeeeaallllly simple concept: We’re individuals. I suck at being a sub, I suck even more at being a brat, and I couldn’t even hope to be a switch. I am, however, exceptionally talented at being me. If that’s not enough, I also really love blowjobs.

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6 thoughts on “I Don’t Fit Inside a BDSM Cookie Cutter because I’m not a Damn Cookie

      • Objectivity is difficult to master with human nature. Just my opinion, of course.
        I know for me, I’m submissive by nature, but I don’t fit the proverbial mold either.

        Like

  1. Great post. I think the kink world needs to hear more from Subs that don’t fit the stereotype. We so often see messages about the “Super Subs” that we can end up thinking anyone not following that pattern is a “deviant” not deserving of the Sub title regardless of what is given or performed.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love this. Hi Spanish, it’s single_malt I hope you don’t mind me fallowing you here- I shutdown my fet.

    I think the idea of a super sub is just that- an idea that people love to talk about but I have serious doubts anyone fits a cookie cutter idea of any of these roles.

    Like

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