Confessions of a Grammar Sadist


Oh, you are naughty! Look at how you split that infinitive. I should spank you until you beg for mercy. Your overuse of that is worthy of being sent to stand in the corner while you think on what you’ve done. And when you insist upon excessive repetition of the oft redundant had, I feel the need to make you hiss in pain. Mmmmmm.

I think you like to brat me with your comma placement. It’s as if you know exactly which buttons to push to make me nuts, yes? I adore when you’re poke, poke, poking me with periods and commas outside the quotation marks, too. Even better, when you use three commas in the place of ellipses…I just want to make you cry when I see that.

Yes, you’ve been naughty. The way you let Word decorate your document with little squiggly lines – only to ignore them…

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