More Stuff I Hate About Smut Written Into a Piece of Smut

Her pussy was swollen like a cockroach’s dorsal tube. His proboscis-like tongue extracted every drop of cum from its entrance as though he was syphoning the fizzling mucous from a snail that had been sprinkled with salt by some bored (but passionate and fervent, obviously) teenage virgin.

She purred (fervidly, obviously) “No, daddy, please don’t touch me, for if you do, I will cum, alas!”

(Continued below)

unnamed (4)

He slowly separated her drenched pussy lips like the petals of a Platycodon gradiflorus, for he was hard of hearing and hadn’t heard her pleas.

Sssssssslowly, her pussy began to gape like a tunnel of starry stardust inhabited by slimy, melted slugs.

“Ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhohhhhhhooo!!!!!” she cried, but he was still hard of hearing so he moved onto her custardy breasts mere seconds before she was about to cum in 50 000 badly spelt adjectives.

“Ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhohhhhhhooo!!!!!” she cried, but he was still hard of hearing so he moved onto her custardy breasts mere seconds before she was about to cum in 50 000 badly spelled adjectives.

“Merde! Enfoire!” she sighed. He watched her wet watery lips that were wet slither beneath her mangy slut moustache, but his lip reading sucked as much as his hearing, so he buried his medium rare throbbing T-bone steak in her ass and his tongue kebab in her mouth, for he could multitask like a motherfucker.

“One!” he began to count her down to orgasm, forgetting that he was meant to start at 10 like all Daddy Doms did. It didn’t matter, though, because she was sooooo throbbingly ready to fake her first orgasm. Then she inexplicably began babbling in Xhosa, for she had forgotten to speak in a more pretentious language “Oh thixo nceda musa ukuyeka usana,” she jabbered, but still, he didn’t hear.

Finally, he spoke: “Thy maidenhead is a pretty piece of flesh, Juliette. My naked tool is drawn so I will fuck thy pussy in 10 swashing blows.” For he’d forgotten he wasn’t in Scene One of Romeo and Juliette, and that her name was actually Tyler Regina Jordan, and that ass to vag caused urinary tract infections.

That pissed her off royally, throbbingly, fervently, so she faked her last orgasm, rolled over, and left his wiry ball snake full of cum.

“Baise toi!”

Advertisements

6 thoughts on “More Stuff I Hate About Smut Written Into a Piece of Smut

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s